A Friendly, Innocent Game Of....Um...Cards? 
Subtitled: An Obsession With Underwear 
 
 
By Joltz 
 
 
Remus, Sirius, James, Peter, and Lily sat in a circle on the 

floor of the Gryffindor common room one evening. It was 

late, so the room was empty except for the group. Everyone 

was silent except for Peter, who was ranting about how the 

Slytherin jocks tied his underwear to a broom and sent it 

flying around the quidditch field. 
 
 
"......and then, those stupid jerks told me that I was an 

idiotic mudblood! I'm not even HALF muggle!" Peter 

cried. 
 
 
"Are you quite done yet?" Remus asked, stifling a yawn. 
 
 
"Almost." Peter said quickly. "I don't even know how they 

got in here! Who in there right mind would give a Slytherin 

the Gryffindor password?!" 
 
 
At this point, Sirius burst out laughing. 
 
 
"YOU gave them the password? You hate the Slytherin 

students!" James cried. 
 
 
"I didn't give them the password," Sirius gasped, laughing 

so hard he couldn't breath. "I just gave him a pair of Peter's 

briefs! You should have seen the look on your face when 

you saw them with your undies, man!" He smacked Peter 

on the back. 
 
 
At this point in the conversation, James and Remus grabbed 

Peter's arms to keep him from strangling Sirius. The group 

was silent once again. 
 
 
"We should play cards." James said, breaking the lull in 

conversation. 
 
 
"Cards?" Sirius and Remus asked in unison. 
 
 
"Yes. A friendly, innocent game of cards." James said 

firmly. "No magic. Just the muggle version." 
 
 
Sirius' eyes lit up. "Strip poker!" 
 
 
Lily laughed. "He said an innocent game of cards." 
 
 
"Yeah, but he also said friendly. And I would be real 

friendly towards you if you were in your panties." Sirius 

grinned, and James punched him in the shoulder. 
 
 
"Sirius! Flirting with James girlfriend? That's a no-no." 

Remus said in a mocking tone. 
 
 
"Oh, don't be too hard on him. He had an obsession with 

underwear." Peter said slyly. 
 
 
Lily laughed again and shook her head. "No poker. I don't 

know how to play. And besides, do we even have a deck of 

cards?" 
 
 
Once again, the room went silent. 
 
 
"I'll take that as a 'no'." 
 
 
"James should have one." 
 
 
"Why should I have one? I just suggest the games, I don't 

supply 'em." 
 
 
"I know! How about strip chess?" 
 
 
"Shut up, Sirius!" 
 
 
"Oh, come on James. You know you wanna see Lily 

naked." 
 
 
"Why is everyone assuming I'd loose? You all could end up 

naked!" 
 
 
"Yeah, right." 
 
 
The constant chatter died down after a minute, and Lily 

cleared her throat. "Well," She said briskly, "I'd say that 

that 'innocent game of cards' idea is pretty much dead." 

  
"Dead and six feet under." James muttered. 
 
 
"We should get to bed. It's getting late." Remus observed. 
 
 
"That, and we have a test in Charms tomorrow." 
 
 
"Charms. Ick." 
 
 
"I'm locking my clothes chest tonight, so if anyone needs to 

steal someone's underwear, take James'." 
 
 
And so, the five Griffindors marched up to their rooms, 

with Sirius muttering, "Well, I still think that we should 

play strip something." 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Any comments on this story should be sent to Joltz at Lndew01@aol.com