HA! It's me. Yet again. You hid from my last fic and you didn't 

review you evil Smegs. Ah well. Hopefully this one might do a 

little better- it's a smoochy romance. It gets really fluffy at the 

end. And in the middle. But not so much in this bit (parte 

uno). Well. If you didn't guess from the title and summary, 

this is a crossover between Simply Irresistable, starring Sarah 

Michelle Gellar (I'm not really a fan, I just woke up in the 

middle of the night after watching the film and my muse 

caught me off guard. God damn my muse.) and Harry Potter. 

It doesn't really involve Harry quite so much as Ron and 

Hermione- would I write a Romance with any other ppl than 

Ron and Hermione? If you think yes you really should read my 

profile. But actually I've just had a brainwave- what about---- 

ARGH! Sorry, my muse jumped me from behind. (Doesn't that 

sound sick?)- ANYWAY. As I was saying, Harry's not in it so 

much, but quite a lot of the characters are in it (You'd be 

surprised at what they do for jobs).


On with the show, as they say. But it's not a show. It's a 

fanfic. God Dammit I'm confused. (In an uncanny Stewie from 

Family Guy impression) Damn you, Damn the fanfic and damn 

the books! OH MY GOD DID I JUST SAY THAT?!? I BEG 

FORGIVENESS ALMIGHTY J.K ROWLING! ::Gets down on 

knees:: I'M SORRY!!!


OK. For those of you who've read this far- congratulations. 

Your prize will arrive in 5-10 working days. For the rest of you- 

just read it. A review would be nice too, I guess. 






11 year old Hermione Granger woke up and yawned. It was 

the summer holidays, so the time was most likely 11 o clock or 

something like that. She always liked to sleep in when it was 

the holidays. It helped get out of her 'Miss Perfect' routine, for 

just a few precious moments. While pondering over this, she 

turned her head and looked at her alarm clock. 7.30?!? That 

couldn't be right. This was the time her father left for work. 

After brushing her bushy brown hair out of her brown eyes, 

she decided to see if this was true. She got out of bed and 

slowly walked down the stairs, catching sight of the cuckoo 

clock on the landing. 7.32?!?! Maybe her alarm clock was 

right, or it was the evening. Yes, that would be it, it was the e

vening and she had slept all day. But why hadn't her mother 

woken her? 

By this time Hermione had reached the kitchen, where her 
dentist father was sitting reading a newspaper and her ex-
dentist-turned-chef mother was pouring cereal into a bowl. At 
a second glance, though, her father had a bemused expression 
on his face and his eyes weren't moving at all. The paper was 
also upside down. Her mother may have been pouring out 
cereal, but her hand was shaking, very slightly. 

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked. Her father slowly 
put the paper down, and handed her a thick envelope.

"Herm? This came in the... post... for you."
Hermione looked at the envelope, which had the address : 

Miss H. Granger,
The second room,
28 Ashcroft Court 
Bridport,Dorset 

She opened it, with some difficulty as it was make of thick 
parchment, and read: 

HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore
(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. Of Wizards) 
Dear Miss Granger,
We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at 
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find 
enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on the 1st September. We await your owl by no 
later than 31st July.

Yours Sincerely, 
Minerva McGonagall
Deputy Headmistress 

"Well, what rubbish! There's no such thing as magic!" She 
cried scornfully, "This is obviously someone's idea of a joke. 
I'm not going to reply, so you can buzz off," she said the owl 
that was waiting patiently. The owl obediently flew off.

Hermione never received another letter. 





Fast forward to 10 years in the future 







"Can you say it again, please. I'm not quite sure what you're 

on about..."


21 year old Harry Potter stared, amused, at his best friend 

since high school, Ronald Weasley.

"We'll add a restaurant to the store! We already have a great 
business together, why not add something more to it! Come 
on Harry, please!"Ron pleaded with Harry, hoping that he 
would agree to the idea.

"No, I'm not so sure. You said yourself that the store is doing 
great, why do we need more!" Ron inwardly groaned. He's 
known Harry would say that. He furiously racked his brains for 
something to say, but then had a great idea as his sister 
walked past the office door.

"Well, we'd get more customers from different cities other than 
London, and if it works well enough, we could start a whole 
chain, in Birmingham, Edinburgh, Cardiff, Dublin, all over 
Britain! And, well, you never know..."he broke into an evil grin, 
reminiscent of his brothers, the twins, Fred and George,"Ginny 
might even become your secretary instead of mine..." 

He had done it. As soon as he said the magic word Ginny, 

Harry almost fell out of his chair, and went as red as Ron's 

hair. 

"G-Ginny? W-why would I want Ginny as a s-secretary?" Ron 
rolled his eyes. Saying that Harry didn't like Ginny in that way 
was like saying that you couldn't breathe oxygen. "OK, OK. 
Erm... well... why not? Put it there, man!" Harry stuck out his 
hand, and Ron smiled and shook it. This was going to be a 
great business, he'd make sure of that.

Harry and Ron had both gone to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft 
and Wizardry. Unfortunately, in their second year, the darkest 
wizard of all time, Lord Voldemort, had risen again, after being 
defeated by Harry when Harry was only one year old. It had 
cost Harry his parents, unfortunately, but Ron's family had 
become something like Harry's adoptive family instead. Harry 
looked slightly out of place in the Weasley family, considering 
he had black hair and a lightening bolt scar (from the first 
night with Voldemort) instead of the trademark bright red 
Weasley hair and freckles. At school, though, in their seventh 
and final year, Harry and Ron had finally defeated Voldemort 
once and for all, and he was gone. But there had been a catch- 
all magic had gone with him. This meant that Ron had had to 
make a living with his store, a very successful department 
store that stocked everything, with Harry by his side all the 
way. 

Harry sat down again

"So. I wonder what we'd been doing now if we had magic..." he 
said.

"Probably trying to start a house-elf revolution," Ron replied in 
his usual sarcastic way.

Harry looked at Ron, and they both burst out into hysterical 
laughter. 

~~~ 

Hermione walked into the market, her bad slung over her 
shoulder. She passed Dean, who ran the fishmongers, and 
Padma and her friend Cho, who ran the fruit stall. 

"Hey Padma. Hi Cho,"

"Hi Herm." They replied.

"So what's good today?"

"Well, the blackberries are nice," insisted Padma. Hermione 
took one look at Cho, who mouthed 'icky' and said,

"Not today, I'll go for some raspberries though!" 'Thank you' 
she mouthed back, after paying. "Bye!"

Hermione strolled over to Fred and George (coincidentally 
Ron's brothers), who ran the vegetables. She'd always been 
amused by their antics. 

"Hey Herm. Sorry to hear about you closing down." George 
said, while Fred hit him. "What you do that for?"

"We're not closing down, George. So Fred, I'd like some... Hey, 
where are all the Portobello's?" She pointed to the empty 
basket amongst the full baskets of other mushrooms. 

"Oh, Goyle's got them all. He's gonna be working in that new 
restaurant in the store," Fred replied darkly, pointing at a 
heavily built man in a chef suit accompanied by a tall man in a 
dark blue suit with flaming red hair and freckles, just like the 
twins'.

"What, Oscuro's?"

"Yeah. Unfortunately it's run by our brother."

"Another twin?!" George chuckled,

"No, he's a year younger. I can't believe he hired Goyle."

"Well, he is the best French chef around." Hermione said, with 
some resentment in her voice. Even though she ran a 
restaurant, it was only out of love for her mother, not because 
of talent. Hermione had always had brains, not cooking 
abilities.

"Yeah, but you don't know him. He's-" George was stopped by 
another slap of Fred's. 

"-kidding. What else would you like?"

Hermione picked out some other vegetables, paid, and as she 

walked over to Lee's stall, keeping an eye on the man in the 

blue suit, she was stopped by a man with greasy hair and a 

hooked nose, holding a bucket of crabs. 

"Would you like some crabs?"

"Oh, no thanks, I've already got some fish at home," she 
replied, all the while looking at the man in the blue suit. The 
greasy haired man must have realised where she was looking, 
because he said

"Oh good, you've spotted him."

"What? Oh, he's just out to steal my business," she turned 
back to the greasy haired man, "I've never seen you round 
here before. D'ya come often?"

"Only when absolutely necessary. It's a long trip."

"Right." Hermione walked away to another stall, but the man 
was sitting there. "How did you....?"

"It's always important to remember that the wind from a door 
closing opens a whole other window of opportunity." Hermione 
stared at him. This guy was speaking proverbs for no apparent 
reason. "Now, are you going to buy these crabs? You're 
mother wants you to do your best."

"My mother's dead."

"Doesn't mean you should ignore her." How did this guy know 
about her mother? What was with him? "Look, do you want 
these crabs?"

"Er..." she thought about what he had said about her mother, 
"OK."

"All right, that should be... Oh no, one's got away. Under that 
table! Don't you think you should get it?"

Hermione crawled under the table, frantically searching for the 

crab. She grabbed something. 

"GOTCHA!"

"Excuse me?" Crawling out from the table, Hermione realised 
she was holding a mans polished black shoe.

"Oh, I'm so sorry! I thought you were my crab- I mean, I 
thought your foot was mine- I mean-"

"Looking for this guy?"

Hermione looked up at the man who was holding a crab. It 

was the guy in the suit! He was gorgeous close up, must have 

been 6'4 at least, and had the most amazing blue eyes that 

stood out, along with his bright red hair. Trying to pull her 

eyes from his transfixing ones, Hermione said, 

"Yeah, that's him. I'm making a crab-" she looked around over 
his shoulder, and sae a taxi with a sign on the top that said 
'Neapolitan Pizzas!' "-Neapolitan."

"Oh, are you a chef?"

"Yeah. Just a small business, not like that restaurant you're 
building."

"How do you know about that?"

"Your brothers told me."

"Which ones? I have 5."

"Oh. Fred and George."

"Right, I forgot about that. Anyway, I've gotta go now. Good 
luck with your crab. I might come and taste it one day."

"Yeah. Bye." As the man in the suit walked off, Hermione had 
the strangest urge to go after him. Instead she walked back to 
the greasy haired man, who gave her the bucket of crabs and 
said, "Here, have them free."

"Oh. Alright. I never caught your name though."

"Serverus Snape." 

"Bye." The man walked into the crowd, and as someone 
walked past him, he disappeared. Weird, Hermione thought, as 
she walked back to her home/restaurant.

~~~ 

When Hermione entered the restaurant, she found her mothers 
friend- Sybill Trelawney- sipping on a martini. 

"Oh, hi Herm. How was the market?"

"Oh it was great. I was offered a bucket of crabs by a guy that 
said he knew my mum, I met the gorgeous man trying to steal 
my customers away, and George said we were closing down!"

"Oh George huh? I swear he likes you."

"He's married Sybill. And don't change the subject. Are we 
going to have to close down?" Sybill moved round and put her 
hand on Hermione's shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, but they raised the rent again."

"To what?" Hermione said, appalled at the thought she might 
have to stop her mum's business.

"£2000 a month."

"They can't do that!"

"I'm sorry." Sybill paused, "So, what was this guy who told 
you about your mum's name?"

"Serverus Snape. Know him?" At those words Sybill caught her 
breath. She and Serverus had dated while teaching at 
Hogwarts, but he had died during a battle with Voldemort the 
day before they were getting married. She couldn't tell 
Hermione this.

"No, I've never heard of him."

~~~ 

"And we believe that Oscuro's will approach a whole new idea 
to dining," Ron said to the reporters that were interviewing 
him about his and Harry's restaurant. "Customers can eat in 
our restaurant where Gregory Goyle is cooking, and then shop 
in the store afterwards. The preview of the restaurant is next 
Saturday the 31st of October. Thank you, goodbye."

"Wait a minute!" And annoyingly nosy reporter Rita Skeeta 
said, as Ron started to turn away. "You say this is happening 
on October 31st, which is of course, All Hallows Eve." Rita 
knew Ron from Hogwarts- she had pestered Harry about the 
TriWizard tournament. "Don't you think this day has a 
tendency for strange things to happen? One might even say 
magical things?" Ron knew that Rita was trying to make his 
lose his fiery temper so he kept cool and said

"We all know that strange things tend to happen on 
Hallowe'en, but this is merely coincidence. There's no such 
thing as magic." Ron finished, shooting a glare at Rita. "There 
will be a conference with Harry and I later on this week. 
Goodbye."

He turned away and the reporters bustled off. Ron was greeted 

by Ginny as he walked up the stairs to the lift. 

"Oh Ron, there was a young lady waiting for you in your 
office."

"What'd she look like?"Ron said, hoping Ginny would describe 
the woman from the market.

"Dark hair, petit..."

"Lavender!"

Lavender was Ron's girlfriend. They'd been going out for a 

while. As he and Ginny rode up the elevator he wondered 

whether he would ever see the woman from the market again. 

Maybe he ought to break up with Lavender... Ron mentally 

kicked himself. He shouldn't think things like that. But 

breaking up with Lavender was worth thinking about. He just 

didn't like her in that way anymore. 

"Penny for your thoughts?" Ginny broke through his thoughts,

"My thoughts are worth a pound." Ron retorted.

"Or a galleon. You'd like to think."

"Ginny, you know we're not supposed to talk about that near 
mug- normal people." Ron had almost said Muggles- they were 
what wizarding people called non-magical folk. They stepped 
out of the elevator, and were deep in argument when lavender 
ran up to Ron and put her arms around his neck a kissed him. 
Ron could see Ginny cringing.

"Hi honey." Ron said, almost grudgingly,

"hey sweetie. I put my schedule on your computer!"

And with that Lavender ran off down the corridor. Ron didn't 

even realise she was gone, he was too busy running to his 

office and seeing his schedule on the big screen and parts of it 

flashing in red. 

"Oh no!"

"She did it in red."

"DAMMIT!"

"You need to control your anger Ron."

"You don't think I know?!"



OK, I realise that Voldemort wasn't exactly the 'key to all 

magic' as my sister so wonderfully put it, but it went with my 

story OK? It'll fit in eventually. In later parts. cos this was only 

Parte Uno. Read/Review, as always. or I won't write anymore. 

(Oooh, such a threat. Some of you'd be glad to see me go). 


But R/H rules too much to make me go!